I’m home again in Missouri. I think I’ll be offered the position in Oklahoma but won’t know until Tuesday.
I have mixed feelings about this. On the negative, I’ll once again be in a separate city than Grenwinae. This is a huge problem with a lot of past history, mostly unpleasant. It’s already making me feel angry and snappish to him.
The other negative but also positive, is leaving Missouri. I don’t know that I’ve been terribly happy here though I’ve enjoyed a lot of aspects of living here. The up things I’ve enjoyed is the wildlife, the home in the country, the New Age community and store, the used bookstore, and the live theater. The downtown is very active and it’s an older town than what can be found in Oklahoma.
On the positive side of the move, I’ll back to earning a paycheck, it will be an upgrade in responsibilities and title, and this puts me on the path for new career. Our daughter can return to a school district she is familiar with and connect with friends. While I don’t think this will solve all her problems, it will help her.
While it’s easy to write – oh just dispel the negative, think positive thoughts etc… etc… I’ve learned over the years that you have to vent out those frustrations physically. As someone who already lives too much in her head, I must put myself into a position where I am forced to exercise and work off the energy that collects (or stews as the case may be).